中年危機，也稱“灰色中年”，一般高發在39至50歲的中年人身上。從廣義上來講，“中年危機”指的是人們在中年這一人生階段在事業、健康、家庭婚姻等方麵可能經曆各種關卡和危機。大多數人到了中年都處於“上有老，下有小”的生活局麵，得應對家庭裏和事業上遭遇的各種棘手問題，壓力實在不小。
下文講述的是美國女作家勞拉·曼森的丈夫遭遇“中年危機”後，他們之間出現的“中年情感危機”插曲，從中可見兩人曲折的心路曆程。值得一提的是，在走出“中年危機”困境之後，曼森的丈夫鼓勵她把他們的故事寫出來和大家分享，於是曼森在《紐約時報》上講述了她的這段情感波折……
Let’s 1)say you have what you believe to be a healthy marriage. You’re still friends and lovers after spending more than half of your lives together. The dreams you set out to achieve in your 20s—gazing into each other’s eyes in candlelit city 2)bistros when you were single and skinny—have for the most part come true. Two decades later you have the 20 acres of land， the farmhouse， the children， the dogs and horses. You’re the parents you said you would be， full of love and guidance. You’ve done it all： Disneyland， camping， Hawaii， Mexico， city living， 3)stargazing.
Sure， you have your 4)marital issues， but on the whole you feel so self-satisfied about how things have worked out that you would never， in your5)wildest nightmares， think you would hear these words from your husband one fine summer day： “I don’t love you anymore. I’m not sure I ever did. I’m moving out. The kids will understand. They’ll want me to be happy.”
His words came at me like a speeding fist， like a 6)sucker punch， yet somehow in that moment I was able to 7)duck. And once I’d recovered and composed myself， I managed to say， “I don’t 8)buy it.”
He drew back in surprise. Apparently he’d expected me to burst into tears， to rage at him， to threaten him with a 9)custody battle. Or beg him to change his mind. So he turned 10)mean. “I don’t like what you’ve become.”
11)Gut-12)wrenching pause. How could he say such a thing？ That’s when I really wanted to fight. To rage. To cry. But I didn’t. Instead， a 13)shroud of calm 14)enveloped me， and I repeated those words： “I don’t buy it.”
You see， I’d recently committed to a non-negotiable understanding with myself. I’d committed to “The End of Suffering.” I’d finally managed to exile the voices in my head that told me my personal happiness was only as good as my outward success， rooted in things that were often outside my control. I’d seen the 15)insanity of that equation and decided to take responsibility for my own happiness—and I mean all of it. My husband hadn’t yet come to this understanding with himself. He had enjoyed many years of hard work， and its rewards had supported our family of four all along. But his new endeavor hadn’t been going so well， and his ability to be the breadwinner was in rapid decline. He’d been miserable about this， felt useless， was losing himself emotionally and letting himself go physically. And now he wanted out of our marriage， to be 16)done with our family. But I wasn’t buying it.
I said： “It’s not age-appropriate to expect children to be concerned with their parents’ happiness. Not unless you want to create 17)co-dependents who’ll spend their lives in bad relationships and 18)therapy. There are times in every relationship when the 19)parties involved need a break. What can we do to give you the distance you need， without hurting the family？”