bloom gentleman of the jury, let me explain. a pure mare's nest. i am a man misunderstood. i am being made a scapegoat of. i am a respectable married man, without a stain on my character. i live in eccles street. my wife, i am the daughter of a most distinguished commander, a gallant upstanding gentleman, who do you call him, majorgeneral brian tweedy, one of britain's fighting men who helped to win our battles. got his majority for the heroic defence of rorke's drift.
first watch regiment.
bloom (turns to the gallery.) the royal dublins, boys, the salt of the earth, known the world over. i think i see some old comrades in arms up there among you. the r. d. f. with our own metropolitan police, guardians of our homes, the pluckiest lads and the finest body of men, as physique, in the service of our sovereign.
a voice turncoat! up the boers! who booed joe chamberlain?
bloom (his hand on the shoulder of the first watch.) my old dad too was a j.p. i'm as staunch a britisher as you are, sir. i fought with the colours for king and country in the absentminded war under general gough in the park and was disabled at spion kop and bloemfontein, was mentioned in dispatches. i did all a white man could. (with quiet feeling.) jim bludso. hold her nozzle again the bank.
first watch profession or trade.
bloom well, i follow a literary occupation. author-journalist. in fact we are just bringing out a collection of prize stories of which i am the inventor, something that is an entirely new departure. i am connected with the british and irish press. if you ring up...
(myles crawford strides out jerkily, a quill between his teeth. his scarlet beak blazes within the aureole of his straw hat. he dangles a hank of spanish onions in one hand and holds with the other hand a telephone receiver nozzle to his ear.)myles crawford (his cock's wattles wagging.) hello, seventyseven eightfour. hello. freeman's urinal and weekly arse wiper here. paralyse europe. you which? bluebags? who writes? is it bloom?