This was the first time,in all my years in the Pacific,I had ever exchanged two words with any missionary,let alone asked one for a favour.I didn't like the lot,no trader does;they look down upon us,and make no concealment;and,besides,they're partly Kanakaised,and suck up with natives instead of with other white men like themselves.I had on a rig of clean striped pyjamas -for,of course,I had dressed decent to go before the chiefs;but when I saw the missionary step out of this boat in the regular uniform,white duck clothes,pith helmet,white shirt and tie,and yellow boots to his feet,I could have bunged stones at him.As he came nearer,queering me pretty curious (because of the fight,Isuppose),I saw he looked mortal sick,for the truth was he had a fever on,and had just had a chill in the boat.
"Mr.Tarleton,I believe?"says I,for I had got his name.
"And you,I suppose,are the new trader?"says he.
"I want to tell you first that I don't hold with missions,"I went on,"and that I think you and the likes of you do a sight of harm,filling up the natives with old wives'tales and bumptiousness.""You are perfectly entitled to your opinions,"says he,looking a bit ugly,"but I have no call to hear them.""It so happens that you've got to hear them,"I said."I'm no missionary,nor missionary lover;I'm no Kanaka,nor favourer of Kanakas -I'm just a trader;I'm just a common,low-down,God-damned white man and British subject,the sort you would like to wipe your boots on.I hope that's plain!""Yes,my man,"said he."It's more plain than creditable.When you are sober,you'll be sorry for this."He tried to pass on,but I stopped him with my hand.The Kanakas were beginning to growl.Guess they didn't like my tone,for Ispoke to that man as free as I would to you.
"Now,you can't say I've deceived you,"said I,"and I can go on.
I want a service -I want two services,in fact;and,if you care to give me them,I'll perhaps take more stock in what you call your Christianity."He was silent for a moment.Then he smiled."You are rather a strange sort of man,"says he.