from that day, i gave up all thought of penetrating into his house by the lake.that entrance was obviously too well guarded, especially since he had learned that i knew about it.but i felt that there must be another entrance, for i had often seen erik disappear in the third cellar, when i was watching him, though icould not imagine how.
ever since i had discovered erik installed in the opera, i lived in a perpetual terror of his horrible fancies, not in so far as iwas concerned, but i dreaded everything for others.[10]
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[10] the persian might easily have admitted that erik's fate also interested himself, for he was well aware that, if the government of teheran had learned that erik was still alive, it would have been all up with the modest pension of the erstwhile daroga.
it is only fair, however, to add tha the persian had a noble and generous heart; and i do not doubt for a moment that the catastrophes which he feared for others greatly occupied his mind.his conduct, throughout this business, proves it and is above all praise.
and whenever some accident, some fatal event happened, i always thought to myself, "i should not be surprised if that were erik,"even as others used to say, "it's the ghost!" how often have inot heard people utter that phrase with a smile! poor devils!
if they had known that the ghost existed in the flesh, i swear they would not have laughed!
although erik announced to me very solemnly that he had changed and that he had become the most virtuous of men since he was lovedfor himself--a sentence that, at first, perplexed me most terribly--i could not help shuddering when i thought of the monster.
his horrible, unparalleled and repulsive ugliness put him without the pale of humanity; and it often seemed to me that, for this reason, he no longer believed that he had any duty toward the human race.
the way in which he spoke of his love affairs only increased my alarm, for i foresaw the cause of fresh and more hideous tragedies in this event to which he alluded so boastfully.