·MarthaRussell·
Oneofmypatients，asuccessfulbusinessman，tellsmethatbeforehiscancerhewouldbecomedepressedunlessthingswentacertainway.Happinesswas“havingthecookie.”
Ifyouhadthecookie，thingsweregood.Ifyoudidn’thavethecookie，lifewasn’tworthadamn.Unfortunately，thecookiekeptchanging.Someofthetimeitwasmoney，sometimespower，sometimessex.Atothertimes，itwasthenewcar，thebiggestcontract，themostprestigiousaddress.
Ayearandahalfafterhisdiagnosisofprostatecancerhesitsshakinghisheadruefully.
“It’slikeIstoppedlearninghowtoliveafterIwasakid.WhenIgivemysonacookie，heishappy.IfItakethecookieawayoritbreaks，heisunhappy.ButheistwoandahalfandIamforty-three.It’stakenmethislongtounderstandthatthecookiewillnevermakemehappyforlong.
“Theminuteyouhavethecookieitstartstocrumbleoryoustarttoworryaboutitcrumblingoraboutsomeonetryingtotakeitawayfromyou.Youknow，youhavetogiveupalotofthingstotakecareofthecookie，tokeepitfromcrumblingandbesurethatnoonetakesitawayfromyou.Youmaynotevengetachancetoeatitbecauseyouaresobusyjusttryingnottoloseit.Havingthecookieisnotwhatlifeisabout.”
Mypatientlaughsandsayscancerhaschangedhim.Forthefirsttimeheishappy.Nomatterifhisbusinessisdoingwellornot，nomatterifhewinsorlosesatgolf.
“Twoyearsago，canceraskedme，‘Okay，what’simportant?Whatisreallyimportant?’Well，lifeisimportant.Life.Lifeanywayyoucanhaveit，lifewiththecookie，lifewithoutthecookie.Happinessdoesnothaveanythingtodowiththecookie；ithastodowithbeingalive.Before，whomadethetime?”Hepausesthoughtfully.“Damn，Iguesslifeisthecookie.”