·Shawn·
Itscaresusmorethananythingexceptdeathbeingalone.
Ourfearofalonenessissoingrainedthatgiventhechoiceofbeingbyourselvesorbeingwithothersweoptforsafetyinnumbers，evenattheexpenseoflingeringinpainful，boring，ortotallyunredeemingcompany.
Andyetmoreofusthaneverarealone.
WhilemanyAmericanshavetheirsololifestylesthrustonthem—peopledie，peoplegoaway—ahugeandgrowingpopulationischoosingtobealone.
Nonetheless，wepersistintheconvictionthatasolitaryexistenceistheharshestpenaltylifecanmeteout.Weloathebeingalone—anytime，anywhere，forwhateverreason.Fromchildhoodwe’reconditionedtoacceptthatwhenaloneweinstinctivelyacheforcompany，thatlonersareoutsidersyearningtogetinratherthanpeoplewhoarecontentwiththeirowncompany.
Alone，wesquanderlifebyrejectingitsfullpotentialandwastingitsremainingpromises.Alone，weacceptthatexperiencesunsharedarebarelyworthwhile，thatsunsetsviewedsinglyarenotasspectacular，thattimespentapartisfallowandpointless.
Andsowegrowoldbelievingwearenothingbyourselves，steadfastlyshunningtheopportunitiesforself-discoveryandpersonalgrowththatsolitudecouldbringus.
Wehaveevencoinedawordforthosewhoprefertobebythemselves:antisocial，asiftheywereenemiesofsociety.Theyareviewedasfriendless，suspectinaworldthatgoesaroundintwosormoreandiswaryofsolitarytravelers.
Ironically，mostofuscravemoreintimacyandcompanionshipthanwecanbear.Webegrudgeourselves，ourspouses，andourpartnerssufficientphysicalandemotionalbreathingroom，andthenbemoanthesuffocationofourrelationships.
Topointoutthesefactsisnottosuggestweshouldabandonallourcloseties.Medicalsurveysshowthatthemajorityofelderlypeoplewholivealone，yetmaintainfrequentcontactwithrelativesandfriends，ratetheirphysicalandemotionalwell-beingas“excellent”.Justasanappleadaykeptthedoctorawaywhentheywereyoung，anactivesocialcalendarappearstoservethesamepurposenow.